Dank and calm

Ah, finally a sun crack in the dank clouds and sky!

We've been having tsunami rain this past week -- and now some calm. This is the grand cycle of weather. First the dank, then the calm, then the dank, then the calm...

It's kinda like life.

Life's "dankness" means all ways in which we might experience "suffering".

I was sitting at work and in the "dank" (all these deadlines and here I am writing this!), but then someone stopped by to talk "work". Our conversation then drifted to what we did over the holidays. And I told her about my trip way down south to Texas, where I visited my cousins and wonderful Goddaughter!

And there it was...a sun crack in the "dank"!! Cool! (Actually, it was summer shirt weather when I was in Texas.)

Hmmm...dank then calm. So, life's pattern follows the weather's pattern?

Some people get stuck in life's "dankness" and can't find the calm. Others are so stuck in clinging to calm, they can't stand the "dankness" when it comes.

"Dank" and calm people are both are pretty uptight. I've been in both places myself. But for the moment, I'm in a better place.

I think that where we "find" "calm" or "calmness, helps us know how to deal with "dank". So, what do you consider the source of "calmness"?

Well, one type of "calm" is that kind that you "do". For example, one of the things I do is teach people to meditate, to imagine relaxing scenes, to warm their hands, and to call up the "relaxation response". Do any of those things and that'll help calm you alright. And that's great for the moment anyway, if you can make it part of your lifestyle. Otherwise, you're back in the stratosphere again.

But for me, that's not real calm. I'm interested in the kind of "calm" that changes your life!

Maybe real "calm" isn't what we think it is. It isn't something you "do" or control. It's something you give yourself to. Well, I think it's more like a surrender, though not the "I give up on you" kind ... although it's smart to know when to stop doing something that doesn't work.

Nope. Real calm is more of a surrender to something, and I would say to Someone, bigger than us when we're in the middle of dankness. Then from that space, acting in a definite way to make a change. Don't worry, I won't get too mystical about this.

For example, I used to be a hill-runner. There are rolling hills in my area--cattle and wine country, home of the famous "cattleberry bush" (just kidding!).

After work, I'd go running up the hill. When I didn't feel like it, it was agony! (The deer and ground squirrels were none too happy either.) I often finished my distance quota by sheer force of will...oy! It was a pretty dank experience, and I didn't really enjoy those times. I would tighten up and just plain hurt!

Then I decided to stop forcing it and just surrender to the reality of the hill and my body, and to the One who sustains all of this. "Yeah Joe, so just calm down! Forget your distance quota and go with it as much or as little as you can!" So, I started running just because the hill was there, it was what it was; I was there with my running shoes on and felt what I felt. Then I put one foot in front of the other.

It was a different experience altogether!

I felt carried along! I felt my muscles and heard my breath; I felt the soil give or crumple under my foot at each step; I heard the high dry grass crackle as I brushed them by; I heard the sound of wind at the sky of the hill.

I went from "hardly breathing" when I was forcing it, to "hardly breathing hard" when I just surrendered!

Hmmmm...the idea of "doing" and "surrendering" as a way of dealing with dank, reminds me of something I read about the difference between "willfulness" and "willingness" in your life. It's a great distinction, I think.

Willfulness is about doing, often forcing; willingness is about seeing and accepting what's real as it is.
Willfulness is often desperate; willingness is usually about faith and surrender.
Willfulness is about energy; willingness is about being present.
Willfulness is a rock, willing is water that wears away the rock.

We need both.

The way to change anything, especially ourselves is to see and to accept the reality of the situation and who we are and to surrender to Someone bigger than us (willingness). Then from that place, acting to make a difference (willfulness).

Then keep that cycle going.

So, maybe there's no real split between dank and calm. Real calm is surrender and faith in the middle of the "dank"; "dank" is an exciting calm that invites us into action.

What do you think? Post a comment!

Joe